From McSweeney's. Samples:
The Philosophy department is now hiring an assistant professor who can tolerate the toxic environment of our department. Special consideration given to candidates who will take Dr. Warren’s side in her 30-year-old dispute with Dr. Wyatt, that Foucauldian asshole. . . .
The Department of Political Science and Public Policy invites applications for a full-time tenure-track position. Preference given to candidates who can publish enough to get tenure but not so much that they will outshine their mediocre senior colleagues.