"Confessions Of A College Admissions Officer"

Not a job I want.

Most of my time right now is spent reading applications. The essay is usually what piques my interest, more than the GPA or résumé. You wouldn't believe some of the essays kids write. Last year there was an essay about this girl's sexual exploits, right down to this whole voyeuristic thing about her having sex on golf courses. Why would we want to read about that? We also get a lot of religious-themed essays on why you shouldn't have sex before marriage. I also got what was basically a report on the negative effects of abortion. People write reports on global warming too. That's not a personal statement! I also got two essays this year saying we need to explore living in space. It's so weird that two people wrote that. They must have seen a TED talk about it.

I recently read an essay in which the kid misspelled "intellectual." We'll pass those special applications around the office and laugh about them.